Underachievers Unite: Why You Don't Need To Become An Overachiever To Be Successful

John: 00:00:00

When I first got into personal development sometime in the early two

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thousands, there was one message that

run through pretty much everything.

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It wasn't always said outright,

but it was always heavily implied.

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To be successful, you have

to become an overachiever.

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The culture was built around it.

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Wake up 5:00 AM work hard.

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Think they're gonna move faster.

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If you truly care about your

goals, you'll sacrifice sleep

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weekends and your identity.

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If you are not grinding with

everything you've got, you

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simply don't want it enough.

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Now, this mindset hasn't disappeared.

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It is just changed its clothes, it

now calls itself hustle culture,

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high performance, peak optimization,

being obsessed with your mission.

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Same message, different buzzwords, and

it breeds a very specific kind of guilt,

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performance, guilt, entrepreneurial guilt.

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Call it what you want, but it's the

guilt that shows up anytime that

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you do something that's not directly

contributing to visible progress.

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Relaxing feels like slacking.

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Rest feels like weakness,

fun, feels irresponsible.

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It yanks your thoughts outta the present

and into what you should be doing.

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And it's a perfect recipe for burnout,

not the dramatic collapse kind of

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burnout, more the slow drip of acid

kind that corrodes you from the inside.

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Now I've coached people who've been

sliding into burnout, and I've coached

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people crawling their way back out of it.

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Recovery is rarely quick.

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Sometimes it's never complete.

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Sometimes it fundamentally

changes who you are.

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One client even found that just

thinking about returning to their

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old work life triggered panic.

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Another client had built a perfect

business with their partner

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and lost the connection with

their children in the process.

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Success on paper,

devastation in real Life.

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I remember a once popular, thankfully no

longer author and speaker telling people

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to sacrifice health, relationships and

joy because you can get them all back

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even better when you are successful.

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Except that you can't because

life doesn't work like that.

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We are whole beings, holistic beings.

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When one part of life falls apart, the

damage bleeds into everything else.

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The price of pain is

neglect and pain spreads.

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Even natural overachievers, break.

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They just do it a bit later.

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For those of us who never even

wanted to sprint in the first place,

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the message seems pretty clear.

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If this is the price of success, maybe

success is not for you, but that is a

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lie and one worth dismantling Firstly.

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Success looks different for all of us.

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One size does not fit all.

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And before we go any further, there

is something specific we need to

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acknowledge about our industry, speaking

and coaching are identity performances.

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We're not only working hard,

we are seen working hard.

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We are expected to be inspiring

on our worst days, insightful when

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we're exhausted and motivational when

we barely want to get out of bed.

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It's, we don't just sell transformation.

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We're expected to look like

the product of it at all times.

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So slowing down doesn't just feel

counterintuitive and inefficient.

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It feels like being caught out as a fraud.

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This is how burnout hides behind an

image, smiling, presenting, posting

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online, stressing out off camera.

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If that hits a little

too close, well good.

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'cause it means you're

still paying attention.

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But here's an uncomfortable

truth that I resisted for years.

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Most successful speakers and coaches

are not operating at 120% intensity.

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They're operating at 70% consistently.

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The ones burning away at 120%.

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Well.

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They disappear quietly.

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They rebrand into burnout coaches,

they become cautionary LinkedIn

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tales that we pretend we never

admired in the first place.

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The real pros don't sprint.

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They pace themselves.

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They stay centered.

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Your presence is your product.

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Your energy is your credibility.

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Your nervous system is

part of your delivery.

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Burnout doesn't just drain enthusiasm.

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It kills natural charisma.

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It makes you less compelling,

less funny, and less you.

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Now, the alternative isn't

laziness, it's simple strategy.

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Success becomes something you build

into your life, not something you've

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sacrificed your life to achieve.

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You don't need to be intense.

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You need to be resource-full.

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See what I did there.

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So good sleep makes you persuasive.

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A well-regulated nervous system

makes you more compelling.

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A rested mind is sharper,

funnier, and more memorable.

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Now, no one remembers that

speaker who tried really hard.

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They remember the speaker who was

fully there and connected with them.

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Presence beats performance always.

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So let me introduce you to the

low pressure success method.

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This is one that the bro

marketers won't like, they won't

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even appreciate me sharing it.

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It's for the non overachiever,

which frankly is most of us.

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So pick one meaningful priority.

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Break it down into something that

you can do even on your worst day.

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Do that small thing consistently and

track the days that you showed up and

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not how much you produced, but how you

showed up rest before you hit a wall.

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Give yourself things to look forward

to and give yourself permission to take

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the time off to enjoy those things.

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So no perfection here.

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No all or nothing.

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No self punishment

disguised as discipline.

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Your nervous system will thank you.

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Your work will deepen.

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Your identity will grow without force.

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This is not about reducing your ambition.

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This is about choosing a way of pursuing

it that doesn't cost you your health,

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your relationships, or your self respect.

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This is being able to move

forward without overwhelm.

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Success can be slow.

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It can be quiet, and success can

happen at a pace that lets you actually

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live your life whilst you build it.

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It does require a little bit of patience.

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Now I'm gonna say it loud and clear here.

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You do not have to become an

overachiever in order to succeed.

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You simply need to do your work, live

your life steadily and consistently.

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Hours worked does not

equal success deserved.

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So stay consistent, stay human.

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Stay someone worth listening to, because

if success costs you yourself, it

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was never success in the first place.

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Choose the pace that lets you stay whole.

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Choose presence on and off the stage.

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Choose focused, patient, consistent.

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Action.

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And as you'll often hear me say on

the show, if you're not enjoying

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it, why are you even doing it?

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Who's with me?

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I hope you are.

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this is a little bonus episode that

started off as a LinkedIn article, and

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I thought, well, that'd be really cool

to share it on the podcast as well.

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If you are interested in following

my articles on LinkedIn, you can sign

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up for my newsletter there and you'll

find the link in the show notes.

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If you're not subscribed to the

podcast, you can do that on your

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favorite podcast app or find the show on

YouTube, and I'd love to see you there.

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So wherever you're going, whatever you're

doing, have an amazing rest of your week.

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Speak to you soon.