Episode 235
Before You Speak: The Pre-Game Rituals That Actually Work
Most speakers sabotage themselves before they even get on stage.
Some wing it. Others over-hype themselves. Many cling to lucky charms or last-minute cramming. The result? Nerves, shaky delivery, and lost connection with the audience.
In this solo episode, John shares a practical pre-game system you can actually use to get stage-ready without superstition or overthinking.
You’ll learn how to:
- Reset your mindset in two minutes with Stoic reframing, box breathing, and a simple nerves-to-excitement shift.
- Prepare your body and voice with easy warm-ups (that won’t make you look ridiculous backstage).
- Prime your message by locking in your opening, closing, and key beats — without cramming.
- Avoid common pre-game mistakes that drain your energy or ramp up nerves.
Whether you’re about to step on stage, record a podcast, or present to your team, these tools will help you show up calm, confident, and connected.
👉 Next time: John speaks with Joel Benge about Message Mastery and why tech leaders need to “talk good” (his words, not mine).
👉 Coming soon: A solo deep dive on the ethics of influence and the tricky line between genuine credibility and manufactured status.
🎥 For behind-the-scenes extras and visuals, subscribe to the YouTube channel: Present Influence
Visit presentinfluence.com/quiz to take the Speaker Radiance Quiz and discover your Charisma Quotient.
CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction: The Importance of Pre-Game Preparation
01:03 Personal Story: Overcoming Stage Fright
02:37 Mental Preparation Techniques
03:30 Breathing Exercises for Calmness
06:34 Vocal Warm-Ups and Physical Preparation
09:41 Effective Rehearsal Strategies
16:45 Common Pre-Game Mistakes to Avoid
21:05 Final Tips and Conclusion
For speaking enquiries or to connect with me, you can email john@presentinfluence.com or find me on LinkedIn
You can find all our clips, episodes and more on the Present Influence YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@PresentInfluence
Thanks for listening, and please give the show a 5* review if you enjoyed it.
Transcript
Here's the problem.
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:What you do in the 10 to 30
minutes before you speak can
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:make or break the whole thing.
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:Yet most speakers either wing it or over
hack themselves or fall into superstition.
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:Here's my promise to you today, I'll
give you a practical pregame system
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:You can actually use no rabbit's, feet,
no power poses unless you want to.
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:Just approval ways to get your mind,
body, and message ready to show up.
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:Calm, confident, and connected.
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:Welcome to present Influence the
show for professional speakers
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:who want their communication to
impact, influence, and inspire.
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:I'm John Ball, keynote coach and
professional speaker and your
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:guide on this journey to a mastery
level communication skills.
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:too many speakers treat the pre-game
as optional and then wonder why they
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:feel shaky once they're on stage.
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:And I've done it myself and I've
always regretted it when I have,
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:think of it like a pilots checklist.
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:If you skip this, then you're
gonna risk a bit of turbulence.
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:A bit of a bumpy ride.
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:So I'm gonna share a quick story of
when my own pre-game went wrong and how
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:one tiny adjustment changed everything.
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:Now, my first time doing open mic comedy,
I've wanted to do it for years, but
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:never really, never really had the nerve.
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:I was terrified of it.
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:I was.
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:Really too scared of that
vulnerability of putting yourself
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:on a stage in the hopes of being
funny and then bombing out big time.
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:The shame and the self-criticism that
would follow something like that might
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:just shred my confidence completely.
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:If there's any one way I
could get myself to do it.
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:I gave myself permission to bomb badly.
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:The biggest win would no longer be
getting the laughs, but just getting
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:up on that stage on the open mic and
sure laughs would be really nice.
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:And so many people had come to support
me that I didn't want to let them down.
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:But I also knew I didn't
have to be funny for that.
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:They were there to support
me no matter what happened.
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:When I lowered the stakes for myself,
the nerves mostly disappeared.
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:Did I still stumble a bit on stage?
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:Trying to remember myself?
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:Yeah, I did.
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:Did it matter?
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:Well, not so much did I get some
laughs I did and it was amazing.
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:But I don't think I could have
done that if I'd needed to get
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:those laughs to feel successful.
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:It may also have helped that the
two acts on before me both bombed,
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:so the bar was set pretty low.
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:That certainly worked in my favor.
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:Your brain can turn into a
saboteur right before you speak.
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:It can start your thoughts.
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:Racing, escape, fantasy.
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:Shall I make a run for it?
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:The field imposter syndrome.
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:Am I good enough?
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:Can I do this?
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:You can restate your state
in under two minutes.
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:I'll show you how stoic reframing a visual
exercise, a simple breathing pattern
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:and a nerve to energy reframe can shift
your head space from panic to presence.
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:So think of this as espresso for
your confidence without the shakes.
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:This is the mental setup that
I go through before a keynote
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:or a workshop to start this.
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:Lower your ego.
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:Ego is your enemy.
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:Remind yourself, this is not about me.
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:I am not what's important here.
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:It's about the message.
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:It's about the audience.
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:Be here for your audience.
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:Then you can try something called box
breathing, and you may have come across
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:this before, and it's really simple.
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:It's breathing in through your
nose for four seconds, holding the
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:breath for six seconds, and then
breathing out for eight seconds.
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:Now, it doesn't have to be exact seconds.
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:You can count those numbers in your
head at whatever speed you wanna go,
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:but it is that thing of having the
breathe in for four, hold for six,
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:breathe out for eight, will help you.
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:Now, there are many
different variations on this.
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:If you practice something similar, a
little differently, count on doing that.
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:You do not have to implement
exactly this, but this is the
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:simplest method for box breathing.
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:There's alternate nostril breathing if
you want to try all that kind of stuff.
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:So like yoga kind of breathing.
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:If you have knowledge and insight
that by all means, use those instead.
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:The other trick to use
here is peripheral vision.
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:A peripheral focus.
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:And this is something that really just
shifts your way from being focused in
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:singularly on one particular thing.
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:Like right now, I am looking very directly
at my camera at you, and I'm also.
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:In peripheral vision, which
means I can kind of see what's
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:going on at the side of me.
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:And one of the ways you can check in on
that is, is holding your hand by your
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:head and wiggling your fingers or trying
to see what's on the wall or what's in
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:the surroundings to the side of you.
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:And it starts to shift you out
of what we call direct focus or,
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:foveal vision into peripheral focus.
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:And this.
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:Does help to relax.
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:You see if you can stay in peripheral
vision, it's a good thing to
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:practice for the whole of your talk.
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:It will mean that you'll take in much
more of how your audience is responding
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:and reacting, and you're less likely
to feel nervous you're just less likely
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:to be experiencing any intense emotions
whilst you are in peripheral vision.
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:So give it a try.
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:Now, the final part of this is to
remind yourself that your nervous
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:feeling is physiologically exactly
the same as feeling excitement.
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:Listen to the recent episode with
Rebecca Williams where she talks exactly
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:about this and why that is the case.
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:So instead choose to be excited.
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:Recognize that feeling and say,
right, maybe I can just decide
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:that that is excitement rather than
fear because it feels the same.
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:How do I know that it's not?
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:It could be excitement.
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:So which is the more attractive
emotion to feel nervous or excited?
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:I'd go with excited.
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:That choice when I made it for
myself, is the thing that led me
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:to falling in love with speaking
and presenting and getting excited.
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:Generally now feeling excited when I get.
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:On a stage.
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:So try a two minute reset
before your next talk.
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:Go through that Stoic practice
of reminding yourself that it's
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:not about your ego, it's about
your message and your audience.
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:Put yourself into peripheral vision.
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:Spend a minute or so doing box
breathing, maybe just three or five
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:cycles of breathing with box breathing,
and then reframe your nerves as
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:excitement and see how that feels.
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:A common issue with speakers about to go
on stage is that dry throat, the stiff
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:shoulders, and the unwarmed voice that
can make you sound flat or strained.
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:Simple physical resets will make your
voice stronger and your presence grounded.
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:And I encourage you to check out the
episode that I did not that long ago with
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:Jimmy Cannon Voice Coach, amazing guy.
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:Gives us some great vocal exercises,
some great ways to think about
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:your voice and how you sound and
that you can definitely implement.
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:But let's give you something simple here.
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:So I'm gonna share with you the
quickest warmups that I know.
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:They don't make you look
ridiculous backstage.
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:Well, maybe one of 'em a little
bit, but they'll keep your voice
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:from crackling on the opening line.
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:So I say check out the episode with
Jimmy Cannon, but one of the simplest
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:vocal exercises you could do is kind
of just humming and humming up and
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:down the vocal range and trying to
make that hum as smooth as possible.
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:Now, if you are not too shy, if you
don't mind people thinking might be a
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:bit silly, try and add into the hum,
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:a bit of a blowing raspberry with your
lips or your lips together and your.
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:Blowing them in the raspy sound.
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:It won't sound funny or sound a bit like.
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:It's not a nice noise.
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:But going up and down your vocal
range with that and smoothing that
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:out as much as possible is going
to help you warm up your voice.
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:Now of course, you probably do want to
make sure you have some water available.
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:Ideally, room temperature
rather than cold, which might
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:just affect your voice more.
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:So that's a good thing to have as well.
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:I also kind of like.
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:Licorice tea.
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:I find that, licorice tea or those
licorice tabs you can get, to be
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:careful with tabs 'cause they can make
some of them make your tongue black.
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:But licorice in itself can be a great
thing for helping to soothe your voice and
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:give you a little bit of vocal resonance.
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:So I do highly recommend that.
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:One vocal warmup is probably enough.
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:Licorice, if you want
to add that in there.
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:Power poses.
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:I don't care about those.
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:I mean, they're, if they help you or
they make you feel good, then great.
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:I've tried them.
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:It honestly does nothing.
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:For me, the evidence of power poses
working is not conclusive, unfortunately.
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:But I would say this, if it helps
you to stand like Superman or Wonder
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:Woman in a big power pose and you feel
good for that, go ahead and do it.
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:But the posture that I
do think you should do.
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:Something we'll call presenter stance.
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:So you want your feet for
this, shoulder width apart.
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:And shoulder width is generally,
usually not as far as you think it is.
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:So it should be in line, feet in line
with your shoulders as best you can.
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:And facing forward.
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:You want your knees, your
legs straight, but not locked.
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:You don't want your knees locked up here.
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:So you wanna keep a fairly loose posture
always by your side and head up straight.
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:Now it might.
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:Feel a little unnatural because we're
very used to often having our hands
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:by our side or talking with our hands,
and you can still do that, but it's
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:gonna come from the size of your body.
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:You're gonna maybe start your first
line in that posture with your hands by
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:your body, and so you can practice that
whilst you're doing your vocal warmups.
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:The more we practice these things,
the more likely we are to do them
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:when we're on the stage as well.
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:So nice and simple more
than anything else.
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:One simple vocal warm up.
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:Standing presenter starts,
give yourself a posture check.
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:You are good to go.
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:Now sometimes the message is the problem.
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:And, one common mistake that speakers
make is trying to cram in the wings.
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:So whilst you're backstage, you're trying
to go through your whole talk and that's
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:a lot of pressure to put on yourself.
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:You're gonna ramp up your nerves
whilst you're doing that particularly,
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:and especially if there's a bit
that you just can't remember.
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:So it can also lead to things coming
out a little robotic as you're trying
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:to remember, line by line perhaps.
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:Having a whole talk memorized is
generally not the best idea anyway.
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:You wanna be able to still sound natural
while you're speaking and presenting.
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:So whilst you may, to some degree follow
a script, you also want to have the
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:flexibility to talk around it as well.
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:You should know.
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:Your subject matter, your stories and
everything else going into your talk
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:reasonably well anyway, to be able to not
need it to be exactly as you wrote it.
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:But you wanted to still follow
the pathway that you take.
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:The key beats of your talk are the
most important part, and certainly
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:many people will say this just to make
sure the bits that you do memorize
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:are your opening and your closing.
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:Once you've got those, everything in
between is more likely to flow you.
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:You know you're gonna open strong,
and you'll know you're gonna close
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:strong, and you can practice those bits
to make them as natural as possible.
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:So if you're gonna practice
anything backstage, I would
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:say practice your opening.
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:Maybe you're closing as well,
but definitely your opening
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:if you're gonna practice that.
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:However, it could actually be just as
good, and it may be even more beneficial
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:to have something more like a set list.
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:Comedians have a set list.
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:When they go on stage, they know
what they're gonna be leading into.
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:From here to there and so on.
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:So what's the first bit
I'm gonna talk about?
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:What's the next bit I'm gonna talk about?
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:It could just be a word or a phrase or
a sentence that reminds you, all right.
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:That's what this part of the talk is.
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:It gives you a lot more confidence.
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:I've seen, I know, and I do know speakers
who will have essentially their set
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:list on the stage, take to the floor in
front of them so that they don't have
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:to go to a podium or they don't have
to pull a card out of their pocket.
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:That set list is there.
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:Or it might be on a.
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:Teleprompter for them as well,
if they're working with that.
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:And they don't want a full on
script 'cause they want to be
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:more natural and improvised.
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:So if you're gonna memorize,
memorize your opening and closing
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:and have your set list, have your
run list for what you're gonna talk
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:about, available to you as well.
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:So you just have the key beats there.
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:let me explain why.
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:Why rehearsing your wedding vows
in the taxi is a terrible idea
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:and what you should do instead.
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:So look, I don't think
cramming is ever a good idea.
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:It doesn't really tend to work too well.
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:You might get away with it once
in a while, but it suggests that
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:you haven't fully prepared and
that really is the issue here.
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:I'd much rather you do that
than no preparation at all,
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:but it's still not great.
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:Cramming the night before
an exam isn't great.
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:It might get you through the exam,
but how much better could you do if
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:you were fully prepared and relaxed?
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:I will tell you this, my experience of
cramming in my degree was nightmare-ish
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:because when it came to my final
exams for my degree, I was a wreck.
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:I wasn't sleeping well, I was cramming
too much information in, and I knew
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:I could have done so much better
if I really just had put more work
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:into being prepared for those exams.
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:It's the same with your talks.
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:If you don't practice and prepare
fully, and not just on the day or
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:just before then you are not prepared.
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:You must consider your practice time,
your preparation time to be just as
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:important as the actual performance.
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:These are a part of the performance.
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:These are the, maybe in terms of an
iceberg, the bits that are underwater,
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:bits that the audience don't see.
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:You audience get to see the iceberg,
your performance, but all the
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:preparation, the pre-time, the putting
stuff together, the rehearsals, the
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:whatever run-throughs you're doing,
that's all part of the iceberg.
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:The stuff that the audience just
don't ever get to see, but it's
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:the biggest part of the work.
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:Your talk or your keynote, you know,
might, your talk might be by day you
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:doing Toastmasters, five to eight minutes.
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:If you're doing something a
bit bit bigger, it might be
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:10 minutes, 15, 20 keynotes.
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:Generally around 30, 45, 60 minutes or so.
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:That's a long time to be on stage,
but it's not nearly as long as the
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:time you should have spent preparing.
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:If you don't practice, you
haven't really put in the work.
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:You're just showing up
and winging it really.
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:Okay.
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:You may not be improvising the whole
thing, but you are putting extra
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:pressure on yourself to deliver something
that you haven't really prepared for.
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:Your delivery is gonna be much better
and more natural when you are practiced.
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:Your comfort level is gonna be
much better when you know that
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:you know your material and.
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:Your audience is going
to sense this as well.
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:So whilst you might get away with it, you
will know that you could have done better.
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:If you are still getting, could do
better on your internal report card,
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:it's time to fix that and know that you
can do better and you will do better
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:by committing yourself to preparing
thoroughly for your presentation.
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:You don't need to over rehearse.
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:You just need to rehearse practice
to the point where you know that
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:you know it, where it's kind of
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:in you, it is part of you.
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:You can't really forget it because
you've been through it so many times.
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:It does not need to be
verbatim, of course.
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:It really just needs to be so well
practiced that it's gonna be natural
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:for you because practice will come as
you deliver your talk more and more.
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:But in the early days of doing
that, without the practice and
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:preparation, it's going to be,
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:it can be hard.
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:You are just making life harder for
yourself, and I do think it's that thing
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:that it always feels like is boring.
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:It's not the sexy part of presenting.
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:You just wanna be out there doing your
talk on your presentation, getting
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:the applause or whatever else, getting
the sales for your product or service,
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:whatever else you might be offering.
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:Those are the fun and the sexy
and exciting parts of speaking.
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:The stuff that isn't so sexy or exciting
is the prospecting, is the follow up
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:calls, the CRM, the personal reviews or
the event reviews the calendar management,
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:the travel plans, and the preparation
and rehearsal time for your talk.
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:These are much less fun, but they're
super critical for you to have
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:success as a speaker or presenter.
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:not all rituals are gonna help.
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:Some are just gonna disguise your
anxiety and some are just pointless.
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:So spotting the traps can save
you from draining your energy
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:before you've even begun.
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:So let me reveal three pregame
mistakes that do more harm than
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:good and how to avoid them.
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:Overwarming up.
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:Big problem.
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:If you are warming up your voice
in your body until you actually
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:feel exhausted, not great.
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:Now, I do have, a playlist that I can know
if I have time and this right environment.
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:I can pop my earbuds in, pop
my pre-stage playlist on.
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:And it's all stuff that's help helping
me to increase my energy, to turn
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:on my energy, not to be ridiculously
high energy, but just to get to a good
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:energy level that I know I'm gonna
feel good out going out on stage.
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:I want it still to feel natural, but I
want to be pump up because I know that
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:my energy, my emotional state, which
I can manage is going to be leading
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:the emotional state of the audience.
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:It's very important that I get myself
into the emotional state that I want
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:my audience to experience as well, so
that I can help to lead them there.
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:Word for word rehearsal as well.
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:Avoid it.
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:Avoid it because especially at the last
minute, it's just gonna mess you up.
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:It's especially being, oh,
I didn't remember that bit.
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:You will wind yourself up even further
and probably struggle to remember.
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:'cause you're gonna go, what did I write?
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:What did I write?
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:That's what's gonna be coming up in your
head rather than just, alright, let's
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:find another way of saying this because
I can't remember exactly how I wrote it.
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:And that would also be fine.
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:No one will notice.
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:You can take the pause, think about
what comes next, remind yourself of your
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:mental playlist of what you just said.
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:And then carry on forward.
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:You can take 30 seconds or more
as a pause if you really need to.
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:Your audience will stay with you.
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:They will give you benefit.
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:But if you start to panic, if you start
to get yourself caught up in your, oh
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:my goodness, I can't remember a thing.
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:You're gonna stay stuck in that
and you might end up having to
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:stop the presentation altogether.
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:I've seen that happen.
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:Or you might just end
up running off stage.
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:I've also seen that happen.
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:Skipping post-game reflection is gonna
mean that you never really improve your
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:pre-game, so we must always look at how
we got on reflection review are really
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:important parts of the process for you.
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:You're gonna get feedback and you're
gonna want it from your audience,
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:ideally from your bookers, from
whoever else is involved in the event.
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:Get as much feedback as you possibly can.
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:Hopefully it's gonna be great feedback
'cause you've done all these things to
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:prepare yourself and you are good to go.
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:But if, but if it's not, it's potentially
gonna help you to develop and grow.
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:But the feedback that you give to
yourself is even more important.
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:So it can be great, especially in
earlier days of speaking, to record your
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:presentations, to record your talks.
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:Not only does that potentially give
you material for your demo videos,
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:which is, really good to have.
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:It also gives you the opportunity
to watch yourself back, to get used
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:to the sound of your own voice,
to how you look on stage and to be
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:able to see, do I look all right?
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:Am I doing weird hand gestures?
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:How's my voice sounding?
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:Is my intonation right?
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:What's my energy like throughout this?
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:You may not be able to give yourself a
fully detached view of your performance,
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:but you will have some level of that just
by being able to watch yourself back.
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:Very different to trying to
rehearse in the mirror, which
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:I've heard people suggest that.
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:I hate that as advice.
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:Never practice in a mirror.
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:You're never gonna have that on stage and
you're gonna be distracted by silly things
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:whilst you are rehearsing your talk.
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:So please don't do that.
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:But, it's a good idea to get used to
hearing the sound of your voice, to
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:seeing yourself on camera, because
whilst they can feel uncomfortable,
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:robbers don't like looking at ourselves
or hearing our voices initially.
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:You do get over it.
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:You do with repetition, move past
it, it becomes irrelevant and.
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:Just get used to it.
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:It becomes normal for you.
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:It might not be right now, but when
it is, you'll know that that's a
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:good thing to get over because it
is one of the things that sometimes
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:stops people from moving forward.
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:So, reflect, and review for
yourself more than anything else.
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:So by now you've got the principles
and here's the completely stripped
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:down version that you can steal.
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:So before your next talk test,
this three step ritual, two minute
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:breathing and posture reset.
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:So your box breathing and
your presenter stance.
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:One short vocal warmup.
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:So you're humming.
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:It could be you're humming
with the bur sound, though.
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:Raspberry blank.
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:Rehearse.
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:Only your opening.
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:Maybe your closing as well,
but only really your opening.
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:If you've got that, you are good to start.
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:You're getting the momentum, so try
it and you will feel the difference
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:before you even hit the stage.
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:So there you have it.
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:A simple pre-game system
that actually works.
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:Now, the problem that most speakers
face is that they either do too many
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:of these things or none of them at all.
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:So the promise is simple
and the premise as well.
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:If you manage your mind, body, and
message in these crucial minutes, you're
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:gonna walk out and present confidently
and ready to connect with your audience.
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:So next time on Present Influence, I'm
gonna be speaking with Joel Benge, and
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:joel is an expert on Message Mastery and
he helps people in the tech world to be
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:able to talk good as his words, not mine.
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:Next solo episode though I'll be taking
a look at the ethics of influence
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:and the tricky line between genuine
credibility and manufactured status.
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:So that's one you won't want to miss.
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:Follow the show to get new
episodes as they're released.
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:If you want the visuals, extras, and
behind the scenes content that I can't
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:squeeze into the podcast, head over to
my YouTube channel Present Influence.
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:Thanks for listening, and
I'll see you next time.